exasperate_me

exasperate_me @ 2005-12-08T21:22:00

2005-12-09T02:23:56Z

someone can start admiring me now.
since i'm over this entire situation.
hmf

exasperate_me @ 2005-12-04T14:30:00

2005-12-04T19:31:41Z

--"what am i gonna do now?"
--"go home"
--"where's that?"
--"wherever you've been the happiest."
--"home's gone."

exasperate_me @ 2005-11-25T23:06:00

2005-11-26T04:06:38Z

sometimes, life teases you. It throws you little curves that say, "look at me, I'm everything you can possibly want, but you can't have me;you're not good enough." It makes the warm hearts cold, and the experienced people tremble. Life's not what you expect. There are no repeats. Don't worry, you'll be fine. Just face forward; prepare yourself for the worst.

what is this?

2005-11-22T03:29:18Z

i hope you hurt like hell one night soon, while your laying in your bed all alone because your ‘new girl’ wasn’t all you thought she was. i hope your thinking of me,and all that you gave up when you pushed me away. like id never meant anything to you at all. i hope you realize your mistake. ive given you all that im ever gonna let you take. if you want anything more from me, you can just forget about it

what do you do when you loathe someone so much you want to kill them? kill them.

2005-11-17T03:56:27Z

okay fine, i won't. i'm just so tired of people ruining my good days. i've had an amazing week so far. i know it won't stay great, but i like to think that it will. i'm trying hard to be happy, but it's really hard to be happy when people are purposefully trying to ruin the good days that i've been having. i'm not just talking about one person, i'm talking about an entire group of people. i'm just so tired of people being immature. if you don't like me, then tell me. but please, stop trying to make my life hell just because you don't have a life at all. it really would prove you to be a better person, but i'm sure that's hard for most people to do.

OH, and as far as people completely sucking:
the girl ratio is higher than the boys.

okay switch

2005-11-13T04:24:24Z

so i thought it would be cool to do it in 3rd person. but it sucks and its gay and im ready to blow up. so for todays entry:
1. if you're saying it's over, it's over. no "we'll get back together later". give me a chance and if i wanna have a relationship longer than 4 months then it's gonna be that way. realize it.
2. if you stop by my house on the day that you get your license, i'll kill you.
3. im just going to stop apologizing because i realize it's my fault. and you should too by now.
4. im going to stop calling you. help me out and dont pick up the phone.
5. the only reason this isnt hurting me is because, he was right, i'm immune to you trying to BLOW UP everything inside of me.
6. you're so gay.
7. im aware that what i said previously was immature.
8. i'd love to see you still, but dont expect me to be your hoe.
9. i didnt wait forever for you, just so you could do this.
10. i lied in number 5 because it is hurting me.
11. you know that song that plays when i call you? i cry everytime i hear it.
12. i realize i've been somewhat of a jerk. fine, i've been a complete jerk. but you've been one too. so if you read this, and you're hurting as much as i am, then tell me. but if not, then please don't ever think that i will ever be yours again.

=( im pathetic to the extreme.

thoughts of random culture.

2005-10-03T20:40:00Z

hate.love. everything. it tears her down one bit at a time
and nothing can heal her
but him.
this heart that's breaking little by little doesnt help
the fact that she's so empty inside and so torn apart
by his creamy brown eyes that stare straight ahead
never looking back. she's wants to get over it
but she has to come down. down to him.
because nothing's going to make her better
but him.
if you don't care then break it off, it's her
and she's not important so end it. just end it.
nothings going to make it better so make it over
over everything that's been going on it's cut off.
right here. do it, don't lead her on.
it's you.

trade the truth in for a lie cheatin` really ain't a crime..

2005-09-20T11:38:23Z

she called him. he told her the truth. this was the only time that she had ever felt the truth. she told him she loved him. he said he'd tell her the truth. she hated that word now. she felt like a rag. she felt like nothing could make her better. how could she be so stupid as to tell him how she felt? she promised that she wouldn't say anything else to any more boys. she said she didnt want to get hurt. because it always ends up like this. whether he said he loved her or not. if he had told her he loved her, she would have been happy, yes; but the other part of her said the truth is good. she hates it. all of it. why should she have to wait anymore for him? she had been waiting for what seemed like forever. putting up with his girlfriend and the way he made her feel. she knew she could wait. because whether not he loved her, she still loved him...

just gotta let it go..

2005-09-20T01:13:50Z

but sometimes she can't let it go she feels so locked up inside that she's become significantly burned with her own want for love. he was her everything and she has the chance to make him her everything again and she feels like nothing will make him see that she`s so in love with him. she tries her best not to talk to her friends about it because shes afraid of what they'll say. she knows what they'll say. he broke your heart, don`t give him another chance... in other words we don't feel like listening to you complain about him again. she knew that's how he felt. she felt the same way sometimes. but she couldnt let him go. this time it was different. but did he love her like she loved him? she told him she didnt love him when they talked before but now its different. it's so different. how could it change this fast? she can't tell him now. he'll think she's psychopathic. God help this girl. & there's someone else. she can't help but listen to other peoples opinions. she wishes they would keep them to theirselves. she doesn't need their imput to lower her unoriginality. she cant help it. it just sucks.

& people change with time

2005-09-19T11:55:57Z

I want to tell you how much I love you. I promised I'd never say "i love you" to another boy. Somehow you're different. My friends hate you. I hated you at one point but my feelings changed. I just wish that the people I love would realize how happy I would be if I was with you. I don't want you to lead me on. If you are, then stop. it's not how it used to be. No,this isn't that fling when you said you loved me to keep me from crying. This is real. There's no way it can be fake when you fall this fast. I'm crying myself to sleep at night not knowing what you want. I'm scared I'll lose you, so I call all the time. Think about it ;if you dont stop talking to her, how will you stop thinking about her? it's not easy. is it? And it's 10 times worse for me.

what she doesn`t know..

2005-09-18T03:38:42Z

they don't see what it's like. what its like to be torn between two sides. obeying the rules, and following your instincts seem to collide at the worst times. I'm torn between behaving myself and taking chances. they can't see that I want to be in love. I want to be the one waiting with open arms hearing him say " i love you" and responding with a sweet kiss of joy. nothing can compare to the emptiness I feel. they can't see what it's like.

never ceases..

2005-09-17T17:43:08Z

slowly but surely you're showing your ♥ no more of the nightmares come to her. memories of you and her crash as you kiss her worries away. your eyes tell the world that this is real and nothing is going to change what you feel. your gaze is what causes her to lose her breath entirely. she wants to do everything with you.clouds of wonder never cease to invetiably set the scene. you & her as lovers with no choice of anything in this life.

fear is for the broken hearted

2005-09-17T17:30:53Z

Illusions arent real
summer skies dont lie
breezes blow from ear to ear
nothing real exists here.
her own small world is shrinking
blue green tears roll down her face
fear wraps the broken hearted
keeps them strong as twigs.
snap her beat her
break her keep her
love her save her
rise above the figures in this mold.
holding onto breath means nothing
she hasn`t become real
nothing seems to repeat itself
she's afraid it never will
kick her everyday
to keep her blood from going dry
the sky may be falling
but she's strong so let her stand
as she rises above the figures in this mold.